In soviet russia...

Quality ancient memes from 2006

Meanwhile in the Soviet Union...

Q: Radio Kiev, Radio Kiev, in a recent friendly 100m sprint between the fastest Soviet and the fastest American, the American won. How should we report this?
A: Radio Kiev replies, like this. "In a recent international 100m sprint competition, the New Soviet Man earned the honorable silver medal. The American candidate came in second from last."

Q: Radio Jerevan, Radio Jerevan, why does land-locked Armenia fund a useless navy?
A: Radio Jerevan answers, if Azerbaijan can have a Ministry of Culture, why the heck can't we have a navy?

Q: Radio Petrograd, Radio Petrograd, I greatly enjoyed your political jokes yesterday. But why is today's broadcast quality so low?
A: Radio Petrograd answers, because today we broadcast from Siberia!

In USSR, judge walks out the courtroom laughing, and see his collegue who asks him why you laugh? Judge answer he heard very good joke, his collegue ask him to tell him, judge reply: i can't, i just sentenced a man 10 years in prison for that joke.

Lenin, Stalin, Khrushchov and Gorbachov ride a train when it suddenly stop because no more railway infront. Lenin says: 'lets find volunteers in this train who will use their labor to build railroad for all of us!'. Stalin says: 'go tell half of the passengers to go out and start building railways, if they oppose - shoot them'. Khrushchov says: 'lets use railway behind us and place it infront of us so we can continue moving forward.' Gorbachov: 'no, lets just draw the curtains, turn on the gramophone and few passengers will shake the train from outside so we pretend we are moving'.

In Moscow a man is watching the weather program while out of nowhere the weather guy says its -50C in Siberia.
The guy cant believe this and so he phones his relative who lives there.
" Hey can you tell me whats the current temperature there , relative ?"
" Oh , well it doesnt go below -25C here , cousin."
" Haha , i knew the weather program were lieing , they said it was -50C."
" Well it might be -50C outside , but it doesnt move from -25C in my home. "

Old one , but funny !